Lula Loves

Lula Loves

Tuesday 15 November 2011

Family Matters

It's been a rather trying week in the Sanders household. Unfortunately a rather catastrophic argument ensued between my mother-in-law and I over the weekend. I'm sure inter-family stresses will be familiar to many, and in our case, as is also common with families, things always seem to come to a head in the run-up to Christmas. You don't need to know the finer details, but mother-in-law and I don't see eye to eye on a few things, and a misunderstanding over Christmas presents lit the touchpaper for this recent fall-out. It wasn't pretty. 

The dust is now settling and I've spent the last few days mulling things over. I've always understood it can't be easy being 'the other woman' and that as a mum of two boys I will one day be that woman, relinquishing her sons to the love and care of another. I'm sure there will be times I'll pass a disapproving eye over the way my daughters-in-law will do things, behave and raise her own children. As a daughter-in-law in the present, I know I'm far from perfect and sometimes take things too personally, particularly when it comes to my expectations about family and children.

As I have already said, I'm sure my stresses are common to many, so here's a little plea: Mother-in-laws, we sometimes get tired, emotional and over-protective of our little ones. Sometimes we just need a bit of empathy, or for you to show (or fein!) interest in the minutae of our kids' life (even if we bore you rigid sometimes!) And if you're a daughter-in-law? A little respect can go a long way, even if you can't agree on certain things. Let the small things go, and if you argue over the big things, never be too proud to say sorry or try and clear the air. 

On a more general note, parenting website Netmums recently conducted some intresting research into mothers-in-law - you can read a summary of the results and get their take on the mother-in-law debate in this article.